You may be forgiven for thinking that I'm working away every spare minute I get given the number of new paintings I've just uploaded but the truth, right now, is very different. It's been a truly awful summer. I'm not one for pouring huge amounts of personal stuff or emotions out onto the internet but I haven't painted anything for over a month now and have no idea when I might feel ready to start working again. As you'll know if you've read my bio, Ivan and I have three cats but last month little Socrates died, leaving the biggest hole in our lives imaginable. He was such a force of nature, involved in everything we did, and without him the stillness and quiet of the flat is unbearable. We've lost our best friend; our alarm clock; our resident comedian; and I've lost my Muse - he was black and furry and sat beside me when I was working.

 In the midst of this the course documents for the Botanical Illustration correspondence course I had enrolled on arrived and, unbelievably, a magazine contacted me asking to use some of my artwork in their next edition. I had been thinking  about starting the course for well over a year before I finally took the plunge and sent off the enrolment form in July, excited to be starting a new challenge. And as for the magazine - well, it's what I imagine every wannabee illustrator hopes for - to be asked for use of their work in a properly published magazine or book. So I feel like I'm on an emotional see-saw and don't know how to get off.

I hope that by the next time I write, things will be starting to improve. I know I'll start painting again as some point. I think perhaps I need to paint a tribute to Socrates before I can start to work on other things again.

Shona September 2008

Previous Journals

April 2008

July 2007

May 2007

March 2007